Tipping demographics

The waitressing job has been interesting, if not exhausting. 

I have always been a full-time student till this past June when I officially came to the working world. Till now it still seems like a bad timing to enter the job market, but I just gotta keep trying.

I try everything. I work three jobs-an unpaid internship, waitressing at a restaurant, and a part-time research assistant. It is more than just paying my rent and climbing membership, but to make the most out of my travel-living in a foreign country; I wanna see a different world.

From serving sushi to drinks, I learned how to suggest food for folks who are visiting, on a date, or soaking wet from the rain. People who start to speak Japanese to me always want sake or sapporo, typical NW looking guys 20s-50s usually want IPAs. Ladies like wines and cocktails. Folks that don't talk much order Whiskey drinks.

I always chat a bit with customers. It's fun to see where people are coming from in terms of how they carry themselves, what they order, and how they tip.

Overtime I realize those that tip me the best are men in their 20s-50s, especially when they come with their buddies or themselves, not with a woman. It indeed feels like selling my smiles, but also being quick-witted-knowing what to ask to let people talk about stuff they are most comfortable sharing with you.

For whatever reason women are tricky. They'd call me "sweely" when I serve them well and have good conversations with them, but they'll never tip me as well as men would. On the contrary, our other male server/cocktailer "Kelly", a cute gay boy, always get great tips from women and gay men.


(Kelly & Kelly!)

From time to time I get flattered when professional looking men or cute boys tip me well, and tell me things like "You have a great smile." However the most rewarding thing is perhaps interesting perspectives I can share with them or gain from conversations with people.

I learned about "MRE" (Meals Ready to Eat) from a guy from California who came to Seattle to do business with shipping companies. He was in the marine and was working on a boat for a few years. A MRE has 1200 calories and the US boats traded that with Philippinos for fresh shrimps. He has a son and a daughter of my age, and he kept telling me his son is athletic and has a nice body. But then he told me not to be too physically intimate with guys too easily cuz they get what they want and would just run away. He had 6 beers.

Met a school teacher teaching geography in Southern California who came to Seattle for a social science conference. A geographer and social scientist myself, I chatted a ton with him about culture and science, and then outdoors cuz it turned out he's a surfer. I had just written a review for "Chasing Mavericks" and got all excited about surfing culture and the sport itself. He was surprised how a server at a restaurant could know a lot about stuff and is actually a writer. I gave him my number and said if he wants to surf in Taiwan he should contact me cuz I have surfer friends in Taiwan. Yeah and of course, he's cute.

It never hurts to talk about my travel experiences, passion for outdoors, and career aspiration cuz those are the things I can connect to people the best. If that aligns with their interest, they'd most likely share insights with me that inspire me in unexpected ways.

I told a man and woman at a table about the story of chopsticks. In China woods are being chopped down to plant banboos for making disposable chopsticks. In Japan and Korea they are using cornstarch and make them into biodegradable chopsticks. I told them in Taiwan we are bringing our own chopsticks so we don't use disposable ones which are bleached and could be bad for your health.

They were amazed by how much I know, and I exchanged numbers with the man, who seemed to be the woman's friend/brother cuz he told me I had a great smile. He's perhaps in his 40s but is attractive.

A couple weeks later I had a phone interview with a young professional-the executive director at Audubon International. It might be cuz we're of the same generation, I feel comfortable sharing personal anecdotes with him. I shared with him my waitressing experience and that particular conversation I had with the customers to demonstrate my understanding of environmental issues in Asia, and my ability to communicate those issues cross-culturally.

Most recently I had a conversation on sustainable practices and government incentives with the NW regional director of an architecture consulting firm. He's in town for a meeting on providing sustainable building consulting services for public schools, who receives zero incentive on federal tax deduction for conducting sustainable practices with their buildings, cuz they don't have to pay tax. I was surprised to learn about that specific field of expertise he has, and he gave me his name card and 100% tip.

This past Friday I served a table of four guys my age. Bartender Kelly winked at me right when they walked in cuz they are all kinda cute and seemed straight. The guy who wore plaid had two gin & tonics and closed his tap earlier cuz he didn't want to spend more money. He even took away the quarters from the change and left me $2 for $18 bill. His friend is cooler, he ordered his friend another gin & tonic, and tipped me 50%! He's cool.


(Kelly and Lily are both bartenders and I'm the server who just started to learn cocktails!)

It's funning that people are constantly checking each other out at bars and gyms and such. At waitressing job in particular you cannot avoid that. But what people don't know is that we are also checking our customers out, especially when Kelly and I work together-we have the same taste;)

Overtime you learn how to read people, and how to invite people into your world in a safe and fun way, like checking women's ID cuz they like to look young. Or challenge men in an inoffensive but fun way, like telling them they should get at least 4 stars out of 5 for Pad Thai, cuz there was a girl laughing at her date who got 2 stars and she said "what's the point eating a non-spicy Thai food?"

For Christmas dinner I'm invited by Greg B., the County GIS professional whom I had a coffee with for professional connection, introduced by Jim B whom I served at the restaurant.

It's more than tips and money, and I'll see how things lead me to different people and their world!